I'd Rather be Sleeping Alone

I wouldn't believe this story if it didn't happen to me...
I'm sleeping last night, dreaming about lord knows what and not looking forward to having to wake up at 4:30 to go to work, when I am suddenly awakened by a shooting pain in my left leg. At first I think maybe I'm still dreaming and can't quite figure out what is going on. But as the pain increases I realize this is no dream and I feel the back of my thigh and top of my foot to discover a hot rash quickly forming. My first thought is that I've been bitten by a spider but then I remember the mother f-ing scorpion that was on my ceiling when I first moved to this god forsaken state and it dawns on me that the bastard's friend has invited himself into my bed. Not only that, the f-ing mother f-er has stung me not once, but twice. Now, you may be well aware of my flare for the dramatic so it should come as no surprise when I tell you that the moment it all clicked together I started sobbing like a child. It wasn't so much the pain, I can deal with that, it was just the shock and fear. I couldn't find the little bastard right away and was terrified he'd find me first. Luckily, I was able to control myself long enough to find him and kill the little f-er with Chuckie (good ol' Converse pulling through again). Unfortunately, I'm allergic to bees, so even after I kill the s.o.b, I'm still crying uncontrollably because I'm thinking I'm going to die alone in my parent's house. I can't decide what to do; hope the pain just goes away, call 9-11, call a friend, call my parents. Finally, I decide to call my mom who is nearly as hysterical as me about it (this is actually very surprising since she is generally a very calm person) and she tells me where to find the number for the local hospital. I call them and they put me through to poison control who tell me the immediate pain will last for about 6 hours, but the numbness can last for up two weeks. They call me back about an hour later to make sure I'm still alive and reiterate that it is OK to sleep and that as long as my vision isn't blurred I will be fine. I figured I'd wake up in the morning with a bit of swelling and pain, but nothing poison control told me prepared me for what was really going on; complete and absolute numbness. I couldn't feel my hands, legs, nose, ears, tongue, lips or throat. It was unbelievably uncomfortable and frustrating. I went to work anyway thinking it would get better only to learn from the pharmecist afterwards that although I'm over the worst of it, the numbness will continue for several days. Lovely. I'm OK now, but still don't have much feeling in my hands or left leg. Apparently I'm going to live, but I'm not going to lie to you, it was pretty touch and go for awhile.